Trumps Greatest Hits: Volume 5

In honor of Joe Biden becoming the 46th President™ of the United States, I’m going to publish some of Donald Julio Trump’s greatest/worst tweets. I would post some of Biden’s greatest tweets, but he literally has no good tweets. His account just consists of empty platitudes that some unpaid intern tweets out on his behalf in order to meet a Tweet Quota™. This is the case with all former U.S. presidents, except Trump, whose twitter feed was an absolute train wreck until he was banned.

I archived a lot of his greatest hits throughout the last few years, so here are a few of the most ridiculous and/or entertaining ones. Let’s start with some old school bangers, circa 2011-2013:

It always amazed me when liberal wine aunts were aghast when Trump said ridiculous or mean things while he was in office. It’s like, yeah, most people who voted for him were perfectly aware of that. Just because you couldn’t be bothered to pay attention to who was running in your own elections doesn’t mean the rest of society didn’t either. Being a douche was a part of his whole brand. It was a selling point for a lot of people.

He also had a sense of humor, albeit brash, that was constantly downplayed by his most hysterical of detractors, assumedly because they couldn’t bring themselves to humanize him in any way. There were numerous running jokes that he kept going, including these wig tweets:

He even did a whole series of holiday-themed ‘haters and losers” tweets, which I personally found funny. I like the commitment it takes keep a stupid joke running for years. I too enjoy keeping jokes™ going for way too long.

Here he is quote tweeting and agreeing with himself like a normal person would do:

Here he is not understanding how global warming and/or weather works:

Here he is beefing with Nancy Pelosi:

And here he is ragging on Elizabeth Warren:

He apparently wasn’t a big fan of Don Lemon or John Bolton:

Here’s a few more random hate-tweets:

A few rare instances of Trump being humble:

Trump gracefully accepting the 2016 election results:

And finally, the “schlonged” tweet:

You will be missed on twitter, sweet orange Prince. Now nobody will know your varied and nuanced opinions on topics such as Don Lemon and various soft drinks. Twitter just became a darker place. RIP.