Things I Would Post On Twitter™ If I U..s….., . .

What’s up person(s) who are potentially reading this right now.  I gotta come clean with you.  You know all those times when I published posts about how I don’t use twitter™ because it’s dumb and only dummy dumb dumbs use it?  Well…  I hope you can forgive me.  You see…  I signed up for twitter™ just the other day.  I know, I know.  Social media is stupid I said.  And twitter™ is just for narcissists who want to spam the internet with poorly written sentences that look like Prince wrote them, if Prince had Parkinson’s Disease.

It’s not like that though.  Well…  it’s mostly like that.  But there are a lot of creative and interesting posts and conversations going on if you know where to look.  I found myself visiting the site quite often to catch up on the daily scribblings of a few writers and pundits whom I enjoy.  But the thing was… I wasn’t able to click that cute little heart button to show my approval of a tweet™ I enjoyed.  So as you can understand, I had no choice but to hand over all of my personal information and get an account.  There was no other way.  I hope you understand.

But guess what?  It’s yet another outlet for me to post pointless, juvenile drivel on now.  Only I don’t have to put all the effort into constructing a whole bunch of paragraphs in one sitting.  I can just bust out dick jokes and one liners on twitter™, because that’s what you do on twitter™.  That and get into stupid arguments.  So if you’re reading this, feel free to add me.  My name on twitter™ is “Meat Goblet” (@MeatGoblet).  You probably could have guessed that though.  So drop on by, call me a faggot, and try to get me banned.  It’ll be a swell ole time!  Peace out, friend!

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