Philadelphia: The City Of Brotherly Facepalms

Oh, for fuck sake, Philadelphia…

PhiladelphiaThis is like letting children decide what the family will eat for dinner. You end up eating fruit roll-ups and ice cream.

Where do I even start?

First off, the flag already represented people of all colors. That’s why the flag is a god-damn rainbow. You know, because it represents all the colors. Otherwise the flag would have been, you know, black and brown already. The flag contains no actual skin tones for a reason.

Secondly, there is no black or brown in a rainbow. Rainbows are actual things that exist.

Rainbow

Do you see any black or brown stripes in that rainbow up there? No you don’t. That’s because God, Allah, and/or science didn’t feel the need to fuck everything up by cramming insecure human identity politics into everything in nature. It’s refracted/reflected light broken down into a color spectrum, not an attention-seeking, virtue-signalling, circle-jerk opportunity.

This is what happens when you view the world through the lens of 24-7 identity politics. You find racism and inequality absolutely everywhere. Even in the very things that are already all-inclusive by design.

We’re currently at the crossroads where real-life is becoming so idiotic that we’re blurring the lines between satire and reality. Life is turning into an Onion article right before our eyes.

The “ok” sign is now a racist symbol because internet trolls are smarter than Huffington Post readers. Milk is somehow racist now because the average IQ of BuzzFeed’s demographic is 76 (I haven’t researched this, but it’s probably true). Society’s dumb and irrational have been given a voice and platform, and this kind of nonsense is the direct result. People like this used to get thrown into volcanoes to appease an angry god. Now they write articles for Mic and Salon.

Now they turn satire into real-life.

Everybody in that first photo is a moron, and deserves to have rotten heads of lettuce thrown at them in the town square. Maybe then they’re learn to not do things that are dumb and nonsensical.

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