The DMV Is Great

I absolutely love the DMV.  What a cheerful, friendly, efficient place to spend the day.  It’s like going to Disneyland, but with more joy and laughter, and you don’t even need to pay to get through the front doors.  There are so many reasons to love this establishment.  Where do I even start?

For starters, they are conveniently located all over the place, so there is never a line.  Efficient.  Imagine if there were only one McDonald’s every 10 miles.  The lines would be insane and it would take forever to get your hamburgers and crispy potato treats.  What a nightmare that would be for your sweet little noggin bits.  Luckily the DMV knows what’s up and had the foresight to build enough branches as to avoid this problem completely.  This is one of myriad reasons why everybody loves the DMV so much.

Secondly, the DMV is the least confusing establishment of all time to deal with.  Confusion is something that completely doesn’t exist within the DMV universe.  You know exactly what steps you need to go through before you even show up, and you never end up paying all sorts of arbitrary fees and payments after you’re there.  Nobody shows up to the DMV not knowing that they need to bring seven forms with them and that they were supposed to have paid 3 different fees prior to even being there.  Clear and concise is what they strive for over there.

On the tertiary tip, in addition to the complete lack of unnecessary attitude, all the employees are all on same page at all times.  Employee #1 may tell you something, and guess what?  Employee #2 and #3 will tell you the exact same thing.  No confusing misdirection going on under this roof.  What mystery fee am I supposed to pay that was not clearly explained anywhere on the face of Earth?  What random procedure do I need to go through in order to pay some exorbitant tax just so that I can go to my job and make a living?  DON’T WORRY!  EVERYONE AT THE DMV KNOWS!  ALL OF THEM!  CLEAR AND CONCISE!  CONFUSION?  WHAT IS THAT EVEN?  STOP MAKING STUFF UP, DUDE!

Hold up.  This post is really dumb, and I regret even committing to it beyond the second paragraph. I’m still going to publish it anyway.  My apologies.

P.S. Here is a new logo for the DMV that I made that I also regret committing more than 5 minutes on creating, but hey…  you win some and you lose some.  Mostly things are being lost though.  Once again, forgive me.

DMV Logo